Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Poetry Competition!

Ok. So the blog has been sorely lacking for any content whatsoever for a long time, so what the heck, why don't we give this a try. We are going to have a poetry competition! It will have multiple rounds, with the top poets from the previous round submitting a new poem each round, according to the subject. Rules are as follows.

1) You may submit any kind of poetry, even haikus (though it's your funeral if you choose to do this.)

2) Get your poem in by the deadline, or I wont accept it.

3) Only one entry per user.

4) Please submit your entry in a comment on this blog post.

5) You will probably get to vote multiple times, depending on the number of entries, though you may not vote more than once for any single poem. More on this, when the deadline has come and gone.
5-a) All votes will be whispered to my account. The whisper should have the name of the poem, as well as the author of the poem.
5-b) All votes made should be in one whisper, not a separate whisper for each vote. You are not required to use all of your votes.

6) The poem must be associated in some way, with the subject. If the subject has been completely ignored, the poem will be disqualified.

7) Please wait to vote until a blog post featuring all the entries has been made.


Unfortunately, there are no prizes for this, so I doubt it'll get much attention. All you win is the title and the bragging rights. Maybe I'll be able to con Tarlanon into making a special avvie for the winner. We'll see. :P

The subject for this first round is "Kongregate!" (I bet you didn't see that one coming.) Please have all entries in by Friday, July 17. Good luck, everyone! I can't wait to see your creative writing in action!

Sunday, April 26, 2009

On a wing and a prayer.... (Tarl interviews Gal)

He took a deep breath of the crisp predawn autumn air and exhaled slowly. This was it. He was going to do it. The gorgeous reds and yellows on the trees bordering the cliffs in these mountains were about to bear mute witness to unimaginable terror. He took another deep breath. Yes. He will do it. Before he could talk himself out of it, he charged ahead. Faster and faster he ran, his muscles straining to accelerate him.

If he was going to do this, he didn't want to go half-way. His heart started pounding harder and harder in his chest the closer and closer he got to the cliff. His brain begging, screaming for him to stop, imploring his common sense that this was madness. But that part of him was gone now, masked by the joyous cries of want and need, fueled by the adrenaline coursing through his veins. Soon, he would experience freedom.

As he accelerated, the echoing crunch of the autumn brush underfoot became further and further apart as he picked up speed. With that last defining crunch, he lept off the face of the cliff. For an instant there was no movement. No sound save for the pounding of his heartbeat in his ears. He was floating, weightless in mid-air. No cares. No worries. Nothing to weigh him down. Just the stark, serene beauty of the world. That moment was rapture....

Gravity took it's cruel, unyielding hold. As he quickly plummeted, a cry of terror escaped his lungs. His stomach was in his throat, his heart beating as though it was a sledge hammer against the walls of his chest. His eyes grew wide as the rapidly approaching ground smiled at his decent...

As he passed over a warm up-current, the A-frame of the hand-glider strained against the weight of his body and his rapid decent. The rigid frame creaked and groaned with the sudden shift in momentum. Again, for that brief moment he was weightless.

His rapid decent shifted to a gentle ascent. With each gentle foot of altitude gained, his heart began to soar. The land he passed over sang to him, the slow pitch of his turn cradled him like a babe. He was free! In that moment, he was as much as part of the world as a bird in the air, a cloud in the sky, or a tree reaching majestically for the sun. He was finally, at peace.

And as he crested over the top of the cliff he just jumped off, the sun broke through the mountains beyond. A new day was heralded. A new life, begun...

Galexan's life, Given anew...This is his tale....

1. When/How did you discover Kongregate? What kept you coming back for more?

It was a dark but not at all stormy night, well there were some storms, but that was coming from Stormwinds 1.5. So, to start again, it was a dark night, because I was not sleeping much and games seemed like a really good idea, I had a roommate, so I couldn't turn on a light and read. SO, it was a dark and gaming night, and maybe I should've been reading, but I was playing Stormwinds, and I discovered through a search on google that I could win badges on this nifty site called Kongregate. And I was all, that is not how you spell it! Anyways, I joined up and got my badges, and then there were so many others, it seemed pretty cool. I had a lot more long nights ahead of me, and badges took them up. I wish I could say it was the people, but it was totallly the badges.

2. When did you/How did you come to find Sloth, and make it your home?

Sloth was this little room with barely any chat that I got thrown into after making my account. I didn't really know how to change rooms, and I didn't pay much attention to the chat, in fact I muted chat for a long time. There were a few times that I didn't block it though, and during those times some very entertaining people called Felix Genesis and Zilflap...yeah...she had the flap still, anyways they were talking and I was like, what? People who might actually be nice to talk to? That seemed pretty awesome. Well...I slowly made my way into chat and we formed a pack that was mostly about muting the massive amount of trolls in our lives, oh and also we all became friends...that is important to remember too. The friends is what made it home, I cannot tell you how devestating it was to lose FG, and now we've nearly lost Vis too. But we've gained so many lovely sloths.

3. Who was the first person who friended you on Kong (or who did you first friend)?

I think I friended the first person to friend me, and they are no longer on my list. The first person still on there...Zil, I mean come on droops, you are losing this battle of who was most formative! (Is it okay that I taunt people during what is essentially a monologue?)But Yeah, Miss Zilflap the super extraordinaire of Sloth, she friended me right away, because she was a kinder person back then. Plus, she was one of the first people I thought was cool anyways, so of course I friended back.

4. What are your top 3 favorite games on Kong?

Teleporter Twins, Zunderfury, and Pel. (Pieces gets a shout because some of my first friends were made playing it.)

5. McDonalds? Or Burger King? Support your choice.

Pizza Hut! There is more variety, delicious crust, burgers don't have crusts! And I can barely eat anything at the other two, they are not vegetarian friendly. =/

6. If you could change just ONE thing about Kongregate, what would it be?

1) A personal change- I like my text in italics, have for awhile now. I'd like to be able to set my text to whatever I want...though I can see how that'd be abused I guess. I'd still like it.
2) Mod change- Whisper trolls piss me off so bad! I'd change that, yep. Actually, I'd rather change admin policy towards trolls...but that ain't happening.
3) For the betterment of Kong- Dude, I have no idea...seriously, I just gave you two answers for a one answer question, enough already.

7. When you are not on Kong (Which is when??), what are some of your favorite hobbies?

It is way more often lately, sorry lovelies! I like to read, is that a hobby when you have to for your major? I like climbing and biking, if I could swim I'd want to do one of those triathlons that have climbing instead of running. I love cards, if you know a card game I don't I will make you teach me. Also, disc golf, and...martial arts...though I don't actively train anymore, I still try to keep up with my past lessons.

8. What is an interesting thing about you not many people know?

I was pretty awesome at science and maths before deciding to go to college for writing, I was looking into MIT and Cal Tech and such...and then I decided I'd dislike my life too much if I did that. People are usually amazed that I switched so radically, but I don't really regret it.

9. If you could have 1 super power (any super power) what would it be, and why?

My superhero, if I ever get around to writing that story, has the power of corrosive healing. He can heal, as long as he has something to transfer the damage to. I like this power because it gets rid of the major flaw in healing, mainly, you are still a weak regular person, it is no longer purely defensive. If I had a power though, flying is so appealing, but I think...Animation, being able to bring things to life might be a lot of fun...given that I also had some sort of clay, metal, or wood working skills. I imagine it more as a super-villain power though.

10. If you could change any ONE thing about this world, what would it be?

More satellites, and maybe an extra Sun. Basically, more celestial bodies, it'd be cool. We'd have more interesting sunsets better nights, and the added heat and gravity would change both climate and ocean levels. The world would look completely different and would be filled with alternately evolved creatures. Yeah, that's what I'd change.

Friday, April 24, 2009

Story Time: ChaoticAgenda Style

There once was a castle in a time and a land far from our own. In the highest tower of this castle their was a beautiful maiden named Kimber.

Remember this is in a land and time far away everyone...it's not kim...not quite anyways, for you see, this princess had a big problem: every night as she was trying to go to sleep, a dragon would come out of its den! A HUGE DRAGON! It was so big and so terrifying that every night it would scare the princess and all the townsfolk so much they couldn't even sleep!

It was horrible. The crops were dying because the people were too tired to work them, the animals were unhappy because they weren't being fed, the town was falling apart because the people were too tired to take care of it.

One day a man was riding through town. He was a wanderer with a strong sense of justice, and he always tried to do what was right. As he rode through town he saw the terrible condition everything and everyone was in. (He was a very handsome man.) He asked around and tried to find out what was happening and how he could help. He had trouble since most people were just too tired to answer.

He ended up running into a local shopkeeper by the name of CAsper. CAsper told him "Every night we have a HUGE DRAGON come flying out of it's cave and it scares all of us so much that we can't even sleep."

The man replied, "Well, that does sound terrible...I wonder how I can make things right in this town."

"Why would you care about a small town like ours?"

"I find it sad that your town would meet such a fate and I wish to help."

"Who are you, stranger?"

"My name is Droopicus, and I'm here to help."

Droopicus went to the nearby smithy to get armor and weapons with which to fight the beast. He saw a big sign: "Nordavind's Banhammers and Banswords" Droopicus walked into the smithy "I'm here to help you..."

"RRRRAAAGGGHHH You're too loud! I'm trying to sleep here!"

Droopicus: O.o

Droopicus knew he wasn't going to get any help from Nordavind's smithy...he was just too mean.

Droopicus kept walking to try to find a way to help the town. He saw a church! He decided he could use all the help he could. As he stepped through the door into the church of Zillian he saw a priest. Not a priest, a nun. The nun Afridasia prayed with Droopicus for help. Droopicus gains +3 luck Now armed with +3 luck and a few vials of holy water Droopicus went out to continue his journey.

Next on his trip is...the pub! At the pub Droopicus tries to find out more information about the HUGE DRAGON! Nobody has the energy to pick up the drinks at the pub. They're all sober and tired and unhappy, but they're more willing to help than Nord. Droopicus steps proudly into the pub (you have to do it that way or you'll get no respect) and declares "I am here to do away with the dragon that torments you every night!" The whole pub mumbled amongst themselves then lazed back into their chairs apathetically.

"Wow, these are tired people," Droopicus thought. So he went directly up to the sour looking barman and asked him what he knew about the dragon.

Huggbadilly growled under his breath before telling him all about how the dragon comes out of it's cave north of town, and how every night you can see it's shadow on the moon, and made sure Droopicus knew that if he wasn't so tired he would have gutted him on the spot for being so brazen. Droopicus stepped back a bit and thanked the barman for his help. Armed with his knowledge and two vials of holy water Droopicus goes North. It's getting late and he might be able to snoop around the cave while the dragon is gone for more information. It gets darker and darker as Droopicus gets closer to the cave...Droopicus is very scared. This is the most dangerous thing he's ever done, but he knows it's the right thing to do.

As night falls Droopicus stares at the cave entrance. "RRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!"

Droopicus waits for the gust of wind to blow him away from the door as the dragon flies out.
And waits.
And waits
The moon is blocked out for a moment and droops look up to see...the shadow of the dragon flying over it? This doesn't make sense...how did the dragon get out of the cave without Droopicus feeling the gust of wind? Droopicus is confused but knows he has to move forward.

Still afraid the HUGE DRAGON might be in the cave or have some sort of protection from intruders Droopicus steps in cautiously. Inside is just a machine! And operating the machine is Microdon, Droopicus' friend from when he was younger! Microdon sees Droopicus and lunges at him! Droopicus has had sleep in the past week so he's able to dodge Microdon's feeble lunge. Microdon fails...

"Why are you doing this Microdon?"

"I have terrible amnesomnia and if I can't sleep I don't want anyone to!"

"That's a dumb reason Microdon."

"And how do you know my name? Blah!"

Droopicus throws his vials of holy water and short circuits the machine and saves the day.

It takes a little while for the whole town to find out, but when they do the Princess Kimber ends up giving her hero Droopicus a kiss on the cheek and armor and equipment to keep up his quest.

Mircodon went to jail.

Kimber let her hero go on to save the world even though she loved him so.

Droopicus sort of wanted to stay and not have to do crazy crap like that again but he sort of had to since Kimber gave him so much encouragement.

Everyone lives pretty happily ever after.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Better Know a Sloth! Part 4

After many weeks of no new questionnaires, I finally have a new one for you all, thanks in most part to da wonderful comb. And to quote him, "One word answers are for losers," so really try to answer these, guys! It is fun if you really try, I promise. ;)

1) What kind of a driver are you? And if you have yet to drive a vehicle, what kind of driver do you anticipate yourself being?

2) Do you tend to save money, or spend it?

3) What do you spend most of your money on?

4) What kinds of things do you like to do when you go on vacation?

5) What is something crazy you'd do if you had the money?

6) Are you a verbal gamer? (Do you tend to talk to your computer, or do you just sit there and quietly fume when something goes wrong?)

7) What superpower do you want? Why? What would you do with it? (Note that "every superpower, or the ability to do anything, or something like that is not an acceptable answer.)

8) What are some of your guilty pleasures?

9) What is your preferred method of torture? (Let's keep this clean and humorous, if you don't mind. Eg. Locking someone in a room with bars or glass walls with a whole bunch of adorable fuzzy creatures on the other side that want so badly to play with and be loved by him but they are just out of reach..." Darn...now I have to think of something new...)

10) Is there anything your family eats that most other people would probably find absolutely horrid and disgusting? If so, what?

11) If dacomb built a cabinet for sloth, what would it look like?

12) If you could train a monkey to do three things, what would they be?

13) How good are/were your grades in comparison to what you consider to be your level of intellect?

14) What is one kind of food that you are really picky about? (Eg. Your spaghetti has to be cooked just the right amount of time and the sauce has to have just the right consistency and meat:tomato sauce ratio.)

15) Tell us something random about yourself.

Monday, April 20, 2009

The feathered Trolls of Yore.....

Once upon a midnight dreary, while I modded weak and weary,
Over many a quaint and curious volume of gaming lore,
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a trolling,
As of some one gently nagging, nagging at my chatroom door.
`'Tis some Troll,' I muttered, `trolling at my chatroom door -
Only this, and nothing more.'

Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak December,
And each separate dying member wrought its badge upon the floor.
Eagerly I wished the morrow; - vainly I had sought to borrow
From my books surcease of sorrow - sorrow for the lost - Zilnore
For the rare and radiant maiden whom the angels named Zilnore -
Nameless here for evermore.

And the slothy sad uncertain posting of each new badge promised
Thrilled me - filled me with fantastic achievements never gained before;
So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating
`'Tis some Troll entreating entrance at my chatroom door -
Some late Troll entreating entrance at my chatroom door; -
This it is, and nothing more,'

Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,
`Sir,' said I, `or Madam, truly your Silence I implore;
But the fact is I was napping, and so gently you came rapping,
And so faintly you came nuking, nuking at my chatroom door,
That I scarce was sure I heard you' - here I opened wide the door; -
Droopy there, and nothing more.

Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing,
Doubting, dreaming impossible badges no mortal ever dared to dream before
But the silence was unbroken, and the banning gave no token,
And the only word there spoken was the whispered word, `Zilnore!'
This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the word, `Zilnore!'
Merely this and nothing more.

Back into the chatroom turning, all my soul within me burning,
Soon again I heard a trolling somewhat louder than before.
`Surely,' said I, `surely that is something in my window lattice;
Let me see then, what thereat is, and this mystery explore -
Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore; -
'Tis the whiners and nothing more!'

Open here I flung the shutter, when, with many a flirt and flutter,
In there stepped a stately user of the saintly days of yore.
Not the least obeisance made he; not a minute stopped or stayed he;
But, with mien of lord or lady, perched above my chatroom door -
Perched upon a bust of Tuulas just above my chatroom door -
Perched, and sat, and nothing more.

Then this level 1 user beguiling my sad fancy into smiling,
By the grave and stern decorum of the countenance it wore,
`Though thy *cough*crest*cough* be shorn and shaven, thou,' I said, `art sure no craven.
Ghastly grim and ancient user wandering from the nightly shore -
Tell me what thy lordly name is on the Night's Galexian shore!'
Quoth the user, `Gimmemore.'

Much I marveled this ungainly fellow to hear discourse so plainly,
Though its answer little meaning - little relevancy bore;
For we cannot help agreeing that no living human being
Ever yet was blessed with seeing users above his chatroom door -
Bird or beast above the sculptured bust above his chatroom door,
With such name as `Gimmemore.'

But the User, sitting lonely on the placid bust, spoke only,
That one word, as if his soul in that one word he did outpour.
Nothing further then he uttered - not a finger then he fluttered -
Till I scarcely more than muttered `Other friends have flown before -
On the morrow he will leave me, as my hopes have flown before.'
Then the user said, `Gimmemore.'

Startled at the stillness broken by reply so aptly spoken,
`Badgeless,' said I, `what it utters is its only stock and store,
Caught from some unhappy master whom unmerciful disaster
Followed fast and followed faster till Greg's songs one burden bore -
Till the dirges of his hope that melancholy burden bore
Of "Gimme-Gimmemore."'

But the user still beguiling all my sad soul into smiling,
Straight I wheeled a cushioned seat in front of user and bust and door;
Then, upon the green-light sinking, I betook myself to linking
Game unto game, thinking what this ominous User of yore -
What this grim, ungainly, ghastly, gaunt, and ominous user of yore
Meant in croaking `Gimmemore.'

This I sat engaged in guessing, but no lolspeak expressing
To the user whose fiery prose now burned into my bosom's core;
This and more I sat divining, with my head in palms reclining
On the Admin's velvet lining that the red-light gloated o'er,
But whose velvet violet lining with the red-light gloating o'er,
She shall press, ah, gimmemore!

Then, methought, the room grew denser, alts poured in from an unseen censer
Swung by Seraphim whose foot-falls tinkled on the sparkly floor.
`Wretch,' I cried, `thy God hath lent thee - by these Mods he has sent thee
Respite - respite and nepenthe from thy memories of Zilnore!
Quaff, oh quaff this kind nepenthe, and forget this lost Zilnore!'
Quoth the User, `Gimmemore.'

`Troll!' said I, `thing of evil! - Troll still, if user or devil! -
Whether tempter sent, or whether tempest tossed thee here ashore,
Desolate yet all undaunted, on this gaming land enchanted -
On this home by horror haunted - tell me truly, I implore -
Is there - is there balm in Kongregate? - tell me - tell me, I implore!'
Quoth the User, `Gimmemore.'

`Troll!' said I, `thing of evil! - Troll still, if user or devil!
By that Heaven that bends above us - by that Greg we both adore -
Tell this soul with sorrow laden if, within the distant Aidenn,
It shall clasp a sainted maiden whom the angels named Zilnore -
Clasp a rare and radiant maiden, whom the angels named Zilnore?'
Quoth the User, `Gimmemore.'

`Be that word our sign of parting, user or fiend!' I shrieked upstarting -
`Get thee back into the tempest and the Night's Galexian shore!
Leave no Kongai card as a token of that lie thy soul hath spoken!
Leave my warning unbroken! - quit the bust above my door!
Take thy lament from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!'
Quoth the User, `Gimmemore.'

And the user, never flitting, still is gaming, still is gaming
On the pallid bust of Tuulas just above my chatroom door;
And his eyes have all the seeming of a Troll's that is dreaming,
And the green-light o'er him streaming throws his shadow on the floor;
And my level from out that shadow that lies floating on the floor
Shall be lifted - Gimmemore!

(based on The Raven, by Edgar Allen Poe)

Friday, April 10, 2009

E pluribus unum

At last, Sloth has her Champion! After a grueling round robin, and a series of upsets, Sloths own SgtDroopy has been crowned Kongai King! w00t! And to the champion, go the spoils!



Kongratulations are also in order for Timerunner, who placed 2nd and Tuul who eeked out 3rd place! And I'd also like to send out a very special THANK YOU to everyone who participated, and who made this tournament as fun and awesome as it was! You proved that once again, Slothies are the Best of the Lazy best!

~T

Sunday, April 5, 2009

There can be only one....

After many long weeks of grueling battles, we are at last at the end! The field has been narrowed, the final battles are in place.

Good luck to Tuul, Trogdor0, SgtDroopy and Timerunner!


Friday, March 27, 2009

I am.. overwhelmed.

Oh my Slothies! I just received the most amazing present a Room Owner could ever receive! Thank you! You touched my heart, you made me cry, and you reminded me why I give my time to our community - because it is made up of such amazing people! Thank you, thank you, thank you! (now someone please pass me more tissues!) Love you guys!!!!


video

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Kongai Playoffs Begin!!!!!!111one!!eleven!!

*** Updated as of 10:29pm CST, 03/27/2009. If your next matches are set, feel free to play them when you want! =) Good luck to all the remaining combatants!

Wow, what an exciting round-robin! THANK YOU to all the participants! Not only for participating, but for the excitement, the chatter, the camaraderie and for the OUTSTANDING battle reports. Here is how the round-robin ended :


  1. Sarsy - 15 points (wins by skill rank)
  2. Puzzlelover1 - 15 points
  3. TheDarkMuse - 14 points
  4. Galexan - 12 points
  5. Trogdor0 - 11 points (wins by skill rank)
  6. Timerunner - 11 points (2nd by skill rank)
  7. Tarlanon - 11 points (hopeless n00b, should have fixed it from the start!)
  8. ldmacdonald - 10 points
  9. sgtdroopy - 8 points (wins by skill rank)
  10. Tuul - 8 points (2nd by skill rank)
  11. kikimomojojododo - 8 points
  12. blakezo - 7 points (wins by skill rank)
  13. anniethenanny - 7 points
  14. dacomb - 6 points
  15. Zil_ - 1 point (She's lying in wait. I just *know* it)
As a result, here is the view of the playoff bracket :



Sadly, we lost Kittysune, GloriousKnight, Everlovely, Bunniesrck31 and Flops along the way. We miss them all, and wish them luck, love, and prosperity in all their future endeavours.


Now...To the nitty gritty. Playoff rules. PLEASE READ.
  1. All games will be 3-card matches. You can choose from a random selection of cards or use your own pre-made decks. Your choice. Your opponent may also choose to use a random deck, or one of their own pre-made decks.
  2. To play a match, check the chart (above) to see who your opponent is. Then simply greet them in chat and decide when you want to play out your match. Please whisper your opponent if you have trouble finding them in chat to set up a good time to play.
  3. When the match is over, one of you will make a comment in this post with the basic match details. These will include who won, who lost, and how many cards each of you killed. If you choose to include more detail of what went on in your match, please feel free to include the blow-by-blow details!! We lieks us some stories!
  4. Limited trash-talking is permitted, but if the other person says stop you stop immediately. Harassing your opponent beyond that point will result in immediate disqualification from the tournament. If you plan to trash-talk, keep it clean and respectful.
  5. Anyone caught H4xx0rz1ng a game will be immediately disqualified from the tournament, and reported to the admins.
  6. MAKE SURE YOU HAVE A GOOD CONNECTION BEFORE STARTING A MATCH. A match lost to a timeout or disconnect will still count as a loss to you. There will be no do-overs.
  7. There can be no ties in this portion of the tournament. If you end in a tie, please re-play your match until a clear winner is decided.
  8. If you have trouble finding your opponent online, PLEASE whisper me your desire to change opponents (for this reason only). Don't just pick someone else from the list and square off, then tell me about it later. I Check my whispers regularly, so I will get back to you soon. This should be done only in EXTREME circumstances, as the playoffs are ranked for a specific reason.
  9. Matches are SINGLE ELIMINATION. That means if you lose, you are done. Great having you. Kthxbai.
  10. Any discrepancies or disagreement should be brought before me (Tarlanon) for arbitration. Whisper my Kong profile or catch me in chat if you need to discuss something.
  11. If there are any questions about a match, the tournament, it's rules, etc. PLEASE whisper my kong profile with any questions. I check them fairly regularly, so I will get back to you soon.
With that out of the way, let me tell you what you all are playing for. *evil grin* For the winners of 1st, 2nd and 3rd place the following will be awarded :

For 1st place :
  • Custom Kongai avvy of your favourite character
  • Blog post declaring your awesomeness, /w custom made Kongai e-trophy
  • The presteige of being the best of the best of Sloth
  • $60 Amazon.com gift card
For 2nd place :
  • Custom Kongai Avvy of your favourite character
  • The prestiege of being the 2nd best Sloth ever to have a Kongregate.com account
  • $30 Amazon.com gift card
For 3rd place :
  • Custom Kongai Avvy of a Kongai character you most often used
  • $10 Amazon.com gift card.
So...Let the games begin! =D

Sloth Philanthropy

Do you ever feel, though your life is awesome and you wouldn't change a thing, that something is missing? That your life would be infinitely happier or otherwise better if you donated a small portion of your albeit limited finances to various worthy causes around the world? Or perhaps you have a dark emptiness which can only be filled by giving all your worldly possessions to a charismatic man in Guyana who promises eternal happiness and free Kool-Aid? Well you're in luck!

So I had this idea, which is really in its infancy at the moment, that we could create a few donation groups through which we can donate to charitable organizations on behalf of the Sloth community. Specifically there are two causes. The first is an organization that lets you, the average citizen, make small business loans to people in many other countries around the world, from Tajikistan and Costa Rica to Tanzania and Nigeria. How it works is someone in, say, Tajikistan, asks for a loan of $550 to buy cattle. The organization (Kiva.org) puts up the loan request on their website for you, the citizen, to browse and choose the person you would like to support. You then give $25, $50 or $75 to this person through Kiva. When they pay off their loan 8 to 24 months down the line you get your money back to either reinvest in someone else or withdraw into your bank account.

The Sloth community can collectively participate in this by joining a 'lending group' I created called KongSloths. It will keep track of how much has been loaned by the members as well as various other statistics such as gender of recipient, industry and region. Additionally, if this idea is picked up by anyone, I'll keep track of the loans made by slothites in a downloadable .kwz file from Google Earth including pictures and various other information. You don't even need to lend money to participate. You can join Kiva then join the group and watch all the other sloths lend money! Come on! It'll be fun!

The second idea is by way of Zil_. She suggested that Sloth adopt a sloth. After a little looking into it I found a sloth rescue center which lets you donate $100 to adopt a sloth, receiving a picture, biography and certificate or, as a group, to each donate $10 (minimum $150), receiving a picture, biography and certificate as well as personalized wallet-sized cards with the picture of your sloth. The distribution of these cards as well as the collection of the money would be a pain since there are various privacy issues involved as it would require me (or Zil... but probably me) knowing your addresses and receiving payments through paypal. It would still be really cool, though, to have a Sloth sloth :)

These are just ideas. Nothing is set in stone, there is no obligation and I don't expect a great deal of interest, especially considering many of you don't have paypal or disposable income. Even if you don't donate money, though, I encourage you all to join Kiva.org and the KongSloths lending group and to tell your friends and loved ones about all the wonderful opportunities to be a part of the greater sloth community.

Thank you, and remember:
Zil_ made you special, and she loves you very much.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Tale of the TrollSlayer™

As written and told by Zil_ live in chat:

Once upon a time.. not so long ago there was a chatroom where the people were chatty and pleasant and happy. Until one day a mysterious stranger came...

His name was... Stanger.

And he oozed danger, and intrigue, and smelled faintly of the dark places under bridges He observed them all silently, noting their likes and dislikes, jotting the little details they dropped.. one after another like precious pearls into his waiting greedy hands. He salivated watching them frolic.. so unaware.. so playful..

And plotted into the dark recesses of the night..

A few days later, the playful crowd were introduced to a "new" character. Lovely and fair, smiling graciously with just the faintest whiff of dark places under bridges. But no one seemed to notice. The new person always seemed to know what to say.. how to make everyone feel special. And the innocents of the chatroom gladly enfolded the newcomer into their snuggley midst.

And then one day, just when they thought they were safe, that person told a story which began "Once upon a time... not so long ago..." And the happy chatroom settled in to listen the fair creature.. named Zil_ .. so trusting .. so pleased...

No one smelled the darkness rising from beneath her robes. Dank and dark and sucking the light and the air until they slipped into sleep, one by one. Then, with a maniacal laugh, the fair Zil_ discarded her robes and stood revealed! Growing to giant troll size with glaring red eyes, the rotten smell of old flesh and the dark places beneath the bridges rolling purtid and cloying from his fur. And Stanger fell upon them all, licking and slurping and nibbling the small pieces in wicked delight!

With a thunderous CRACK! the door crashed open! Sunlight flared from behind the figure in the doorway and the giant troll scurried away from the light, dragging the nearest body into the darkest corner with him. A man stepped into the darkness wrinkling his nose at the odor. "I know you are here..." he called.

But Stanger stayed silent, waiting for his moment. He narrowed his eyes and calculated his chances.. this man would be no challenge. Suddenly, an eerie metallic ring echoed through the deathly silent room. Brilliant rays of light reflected off the perfectly polished blade as the imposing man pulled the The TrollSlayer™ forth from it's scabbard. Stangers eye widened in fear!!

It couldnt be!??! This man was a myth.. whispered to naughty trollings late at night! But oh no! He was here!

Tarlanon's laughter boomed around the room. "I smell your fear!"

Stanger whimpered with fear and abandoned his prey (a juicy morsel known as Afrikaisi). He broke for the door, desparate to be away from the mythical man. Fleeing for his life, all confidence lost, the troll lunged towards the door.

"Zing!!"

Flashing again in the sun the TrollSlayer™ swung once. Once was enough. Stanger's head rolled out the door... leaving the body behind.

Tarlanon pushed the door open the rest of the way with the tip of the TrollSlayer™ and allowed the sunlight played across the fallen troll body, now oozing ichor across the floor. As the sunlight played across the body, it began to bubble and steam, and then in sudden furious boil exploded,
strewing cookies with rainbow chips across the room!

Tarlanon grinned and sheathed his sword. Debonairly, he scooped up a handful of cookies and crossed to the ravishing young woman in the far corner. Pulling her to his chest he waved the cookie beneath her nose. Afri's eyes slowly opened, staring into his bearded face.

"Is it over?" she whispered breathlessly.

"It's over." he replied, smiling gently into her eyes.

"And now you have an endless supply of Rainbow Cookies."

Her eyes lit up with glee! "Rainbow cookies! We can never thank you enough!"
"How can we ever repay you, oh mighty Tarlanon??"

He stood suddenly, swirling his cape around him. "There is no need for payment!" he called, heading towards the door where he stopped and stooped a moment, picking something up.

"Only promise me this...The next time something fair and lovely twines its way into your fellowship..Always remember...it might be this!" And he presented the head of the troll and tossed it to roll to her feet.

The dead eyes of Stanger stared up at her... still hungry...Still red..Still inviting her to laugh with Zil_, the legendary troll in disguise. Afri gasped. And when she raised her eyes again Tarlanon was gone.

Slowly, she roused the sleeping Slothies and told them the tale. They mounted the head above the door, that they might never forget as they feasted on Rainbow Chip cookies...to beware The Troll!

Monday, February 23, 2009

Professor Sloth Solves a Problem

Today’s problem: What is a Slothite?

Here at Professor Sloth’s, we, used in the royal sense, are in the business of solving problems. However, sometimes a problem is so endemic that no one but said astounding professor is keyed into its knowledge. I am asked constantly, “Professor Sloth! What is a Slothite? Durdurdur”. My unfailing response is of course, Wrong! Wrong wrong wrong wrong. Not correct. A Slothite? A!? The idea that a Slothite is some sort of individual is of course, absurd.

As any well educated Sloth knows, slothite is in fact an ancient and rare mineral. Slothite, being a condensed and pure form of laziness, formed immediately after the Big Bang decided to take a break. From that point on it has been deposited in large, but relatively safe amounts throughout history. It was not until the relatively recent invention of flash gaming that enough slothite was available in one place to study it in a meaningful way. Flash gamers turned out to be a spectacular source of slothite, depositing small portions during each day long gaming session.

While rare, slothite was not seen as useful to the wider public, and so this discovery was largely overlooked. Or it was, until Mortimer Triddle P.I. found a rather outstanding use for slothite during a power nap that turned into a week long coma. Exposed to toxic amounts of slothite during his last case, only his grit and detective spirit pulled him through the excessive amounts of sloth he was experiencing. Upon waking, he used his incredible deductive skills and realized the slothite was responsible. Thinking as a true capitalist, and desperate for money after seeing his hospital bill, he marketed small doses of slothite as a cure for all sorts of nervous and sleep disorders.

Subsequently, gaming sites became mini-factories for the precious, precious gray gold. Industries were started to create, collect, and sift slothite from other common or annoying minerals such as Borite (condensed whines of “I’m bored”). Certain rooms, not high with activity were used as storehouses for the slothite waiting to reach the masses. It was in these warehouses that the effect of copious amounts of slothite was first observed. Fortunately, it took a truly spectacular event for slothite tycoons to realize that they needed stricter methods of storing their fortunes.

I speak here of the creation of Sloth. In the early days of slothite refining, a room was created, bigger and more splendid than any other. They named it Sloth, after what it would be storing. As the grandest and most active of all depots, Sloth was also destined for the grandest of slothite reactions. There are few written records of the disaster, most surviving victims being too lazy to write down their accounts. However, they say it happened during a leap year, a time when even the Father Time needs an extra day to sit down and rest and everyone takes a little time to sleep in. Perhaps this was what started the process which would forever be known as the “Not Quite so Big, but Close Enough and Jolly Good” Bang. The closely packed slothite began to slouch dangerously together, eventually forming a giant mass and in the ensuing explosion unleashing a wave of laze unlike any before or after it. Ground Zero, or Sloth Central as it became known, was so densely packed with laze and bliss that the effect lingers to this day, enhancing, (some may say damaging) all who enter.

This has been a brief history of slothite, the creation of the universe, industry, and modern medicine. In closing, you are all wrong, and I am always right.
-Professor Sloth

Calling all Sloths! Professor Sloth wants this source of income to become steady...say on a weekly basis. For that he is going to need more questions. Compete in the comments section to make sure your question is next up on the chopping block for Professor Sloth's Axe of Knowledge!

Legal Disclaimer: Professor Sloth is is no way sponsored by Kongregate or any of its affiliates. Professor Sloth is not royalty in any nation and should not be treated as such. Professor Sloth is a bit of a jerk, but we find him useful. Professor Sloth is not responsible for any slothite reactions caused by reading this blog. Professor Sloth thinks you should wear blue more often. Professor Sloth may not legally be a graduate of any institute of higher education. We have not promised to pay Professor Sloth.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Better Know a Sloth! Part 3

OK, so the blog was looking pretty stagnant *glares at Zil for never adding anything* so I thought I might as well add something new, even if it was just a bit half-baked. So here is the third questionnaire. Don't blame _me_ i it isn't very creative!!!

1) What is your astrological sign?

2) What Chinese year were you born in? (i.e. Ox, Rooster, Snake, etc.)

3) Take this test and tell us what you are! Do you think this is accurate? Why or why not?

4) If Sloth were a real place, what would it look like?

5) Italian food is fantastic, there is no denying it. What Italian food do you like best and why? (Note that pizza is not an option. The god of Sloth will not accept your boring, not-thought-out answers.)

6) Apologies to everyone that is in a foreign country devoid of the classic American food chains, this is another one of those questions. Do you prefer Pizza Hut, Dominoes, Papa John's, or some random other pizza chain?

7) Are there any classic stereotypes that you fall into?

8) Are there any stereotypes that you don't fall into?

9) If you were a plant, what kind of plant would you be?

10) How much do you sweat?

11) What makes your eyes bleed more: excessive caps, or regular ol' spam?

12) When you were really little, what did you think you wanted to grow up to be/do? (Basically, tell us something you wanted when you were little, but think is horrifying now...or somesuch..)

13) Do a google images search for Jensen Ackles. Now is he hot or what?!?! (Note that hot, or yes, would be the correct answer >.>)

14) If you could be an inanimate object what would you choose to be, and if your close friends had the choice what would they choose for you?

15) If you had to choose only one person to retain a memory of, do you know who you would choose? (This means that you would not remember anyone else but them.) (Also, this is just a yes or no question. No need to reveal to us anything more.)

Monday, February 2, 2009

Round 3 begins!!!

Round 3 begins!! This will be the final qualifying matchup before we start the playoffs! Here are the current standings (Points explained below):



















Player Points
Sarsy 10
PuzzleLover1 10
Tarlanon 10
Timerunner 10
TheDarkMuse 9
SgtDroopy 7
Galexan 7
Kittysune 7
Blakezo 6
Trogdor0 6
Tuul 6
GloriousKnight 6
Bunniesrck31 5
Dacomb 5
ldmacdonald 5
kikimomojojododo 3
anniethenanny 2
Zil_ 1



You'll notice there are two players missing. While we shall all greatly miss Evers and Flops unique presence in the tournament, they both had to drop. We all wish them well in their travels!

Before playing this round, please review the rules and regulations. Because round two is finished, there will be NO NEW ENTRANTS allowed. The begging to be added is still permitted.
  1. All games will be 3-card matches. You can choose from a random selection of cards or use your own pre-made decks. Your choice. Your opponent may also choose to use a random deck, or one of their own pre-made decks.
  2. To play a match, check the chart (below) to see who your opponent is. Then simply greet them in chat and decide when you want to play out your match. Please whisper your opponent if you have trouble finding them in chat to set up a good time to play.
  3. During the match, record how many of your opponents cards you kill, and how many of your cards are killed. This is needed when reporting match results.
  4. When the match is over, one of you will make a comment in this post with the basic match details. These will include who won, who lost, and how many cards each of you killed. If you choose to include more detail of what went on in your match, please feel free to include the blow-by-blow details!! We lieks us some stories!
  5. Limited trash-talking is permitted, but if the other person says stop you stop immediately. Harassing your opponent beyond that point will result in immediate disqualification from the tournament. If you plan to trash-talk, keep it clean and respectful.
  6. Anyone caught H4xx0rz1ng a game will be immediately disqualified from the tournament, and reported to the admins.
  7. MAKE SURE YOU HAVE A GOOD CONNECTION BEFORE STARTING A MATCH. A match lost to a timeout or disconnect will still count as a loss to you. There will be no do-overs.
  8. Ties are acceptable in this portion of the tournament. However, if you and your opponent both agree to a rematch to determine a clear winner, that is acceptable. However re-playing a decided match is not.
  9. If you have trouble finding your opponent online, PLEASE whisper me your desire to change opponents (for this reason only). Don't just pick someone else from the list and square off, then tell me about it later. I Check my whispers regularly, so I will get back to you soon.
  10. Matches are scored in the following manner. Win = 2 points. Tie = 1 point. 1 additional point is added for each card you kill. This will be used later when seeding the brackets for the single-elimination playoffs.
  11. Any discrepancies or disagreement should be brought before me (Tarlanon) for arbitration. Whisper my Kong profile or catch me in chat if you need to discuss something.
  12. This tournament will consist of a 3 round qualifier (currently in round 2) followed which will seed a single-elimination playoff round. Seeding for the playoffs will be based on total points, then by Skill rank if there is a tie.
  13. If there are any questions about a match, the tournament, it's rules, etc. PLEASE whisper my kong profile with any questions. I check them fairly regularly, so I will get back to you soon.
Good luck!




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Sunday, February 1, 2009

The Key to Making Friends In Sloth

Any high class person will tell you that etiquette is an integral part in every social gathering, and Sloth is nothing if not high class. As a highly social room, I thought it important to impart my wisdom to all of you lovely Slothies out there, about how to behave properly in our lovely room. Being a well-behaved Sloth will inevitably lead you to being a well-loved Sloth, which will in turn lead to you being one booty kicking gamer and Konger.

1) Always try your best to follow the Three Line Thang. Remember, three is fine, but four is over the line. If you break the thang, be prepared to be flogged with wet noodles, and chastised by your slothy peers. You have been warned. ;) Also, please do not post ascii art. This means no dancing kirbys, no kittens, no guitar or rock on hands, etc. Ascii art is just spam.

2) Trolls are hungry little demons who just never seem to get enough. Should a troll enter a room, there are four things you should remember. 1: BYOM. Being your own mod is a surprisingly simple, enjoyable, and beneficial thing to do. Muting someone gets them out of your chat, and off your mind. 2: Porcupine. Saying this word is a very easy way to warn your fellow sloths of a invading troll, and mass mute his ugly little behind. Plus, it does not feed the troll, because he probably does not know why you said that, and it wasn't directed at him in the first place. 3: Modfriend. If none of Sloth's lovely resident mods is not in the room or paying attention to chat, just search "Modfriend" and find the list of Modfriend's friends, all of which are mods. There, you can see which mods are in chat, and whisper to them asking for their help. If you don't get a response, do not worry, just whisper to another one! 4: Do NOT feed the troll. I cannot stress this enough. You may think you are helping the room, or a mod, by telling the troll to stfu, or that they are an idiot, or to leave sloth, but you are, in fact, only making things worse for the entire room.

3) Snuggling is one of the keystones of Sloth society. If one of your pals snuggles with you, the proper thing to do is to respond with a wuggle. Remember this, and all of life's secrets will fall into place.

4)Huggles, glomps, and snuggawugs are two other friendly gestures you may encounter while visiting Sloth, and may be responded to by any of the already mentioned methods.

5)Snurkles and froodles are anomalies in the world of Sloth. No one knows where they came from, or why they are here, but should Zil_ deem you fit to receive one, you should be honored.

6)Share you food pl0x! Cookies, pies, tacos, and most other foods are always welcome in our lovely room. Should you come across any deliciousness on your travels, please share with the room. Sharing is caring! And we will very much appreciate it. All this lazing around is very hard work, and we Sloths get very hungry. (Please note however that this does not give you permission to spam food or anything. Spam is bad in all its forms, and just because you are sharing your food, it doesn't give you the right to spam.)

7)Avoid dangerous conversation topics like politics, religion, and sports. Trolls often like to hide among us, masquerading as nice, normal users, but such topics often bring out the worst in people, and the trolls show their true colors, sending our room into chaos.

8) Follow all of Kongregate's rules. Should you ever need a refresher course in them visit this page.

9) Google is your friend. When everyone is playing a new badge game, or another new game, and trying to figure it out together, asking for help is fine. It is fun for the room to participate in figuring out the secrets of a game together. However, old games such as The Visitor, or Reemus, have been played by most of the people in the room, and walkthroughs are plastered all over the internet, easily accessed via a quick google search.

10) Please don't post your play-by-plays. No one cares that your sniper just got artyed, and now you bought a gunner, and now a boss wave is coming, and now you got bombed to death so you are going to play sonny, and now you are facing the baron and oh crap he killed you, and omg the paladin is strong, and yay i stunned him, etc.

11) Be nice to visitors. It is true, invaders from other rooms can be a bad thing, but some of them are very nice. Try not to alienate our pals from Lunatic Pandora, or Digg Mark 1, for example. Remember, if someone is bugging you, you can always just mute them.

12) Lather, rinse, repeat. We don't want any stinky Sloths smelling up our home.

13) Clean up after yourself. Dirty dishes will not be tolerated. Whether your cleaning method consists of washing them, or simply tossing them into The Vortex, we don't mind, as long as they aren't messing up our room.

14) Cuddle puddles are always welcome. They are great for spreading the lurve and group bonding.

15) Any doubts about whether or not what you are about to type is appropriate? Don't post it! Tis better to be safe than sorry.

Follow all of these guidelines, and I'm sure that your stay in Sloth will be a good one, and you will develop many friendships with the fantastic people that frequent our lovely room.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Round 2 Begins!

Round 2 begins!! Here are the current standings (Points explained below):





















Player Points
Everlovely 5
Sarsy 5
PuzzleLover1 5
SgtDroopy 5
Timerunner 5
Tuul 5
Tarlanon 5
GloriousKnight 5
Dacomb 5
TheDarkMuse 4
Trogdor0 4
Galexan 2
ldmacdonald 2
anniethenanny 2
kikimomojojododo 2
Kittysune 2
Blakezo 1
Flops 1
Zil_ 1
Bunniesrck31 0



Before we start this round, let's review the rules and regulations since there was some confusion in the 1st round. THERE ARE SOME CHANGES, so please read through them all fully.(changes/updates are bolded) Because round one is finished, there will be NO NEW ENTRANTS allowed. The begging to be added is still permitted.

  1. All games will be 3-card matches. You can choose from a random selection of cards or use your own pre-made decks. Your choice. Your opponent may also choose to use a random deck, or one of their own pre-made decks.
  2. To play a match, check the chart (below) to see who your opponent is. Then simply greet them in chat and decide when you want to play out your match. Please whisper your opponent if you have trouble finding them in chat to set up a good time to play.
  3. During the match, record how many of your opponents cards you kill, and how many of your cards are killed. This is needed when reporting match results.
  4. When the match is over, one of you will make a comment in this post with the basic match details. These will include who won, who lost, and how many cards each of you killed. If you choose to include more detail of what went on in your match, please feel free to include the blow-by-blow details!! We lieks us some stories!
  5. Limited trash-talking is permitted, but if the other person says stop you stop immediately. Harassing your opponent beyond that point will result in immediate disqualification from the tournament. If you plan to trash-talk, keep it clean and respectful.
  6. Anyone caught H4xx0rz1ng a game will be immediately disqualified from the tournament, and reported to the admins.
  7. MAKE SURE YOU HAVE A GOOD CONNECTION BEFORE STARTING A MATCH. A match lost to a timeout or disconnect will still count as a loss to you. There will be no do-overs.
  8. Ties are acceptable in this portion of the tournament. However, if you and your opponent both agree to a rematch to determine a clear winner, that is acceptable. However re-playing a decided match is not.
  9. If you have trouble finding your opponent online, PLEASE whisper me your desire to change opponents (for this reason only). Don't just pick someone else from the list and square off, then tell me about it later. I Check my whispers regularly, so I will get back to you soon.
  10. Matches are scored in the following manner. Win = 2 points. Tie = 1 point. 1 additional point is added for each card you kill. This will be used later when seeding the brackets for the single-elimination playoffs.
  11. Any discrepancies or disagreement should be brought before me (Tarlanon) for arbitration. Whisper my Kong profile or catch me in chat if you need to discuss something.
  12. This tournament will consist of a 3 round qualifier (currently in round 2) followed which will seed a single-elimination playoff round. Seeding for the playoffs will be based on total points, then by Skill rank if there is a tie.
  13. If there are any questions about a match, the tournament, it's rules, etc. PLEASE whisper my kong profile with any questions. I check them fairly regularly, so I will get back to you soon.
Good luck!




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As an added bonus, you can use Kreds to 'tip' the developers of your favourite games, to encourage them to make more of the games you love! Buy some Kreds today!!

Acrony night was a raging success!!

Well, Sloths 1st official Acrony night was a complete success! MANY of the Sloth regs were able to attend, and even a few from other rooms snuck in to enjoy our good time. I think at it's height we had 12 people in there, coming up with some pretty spectacularly crafty acronyms to the letters that were spawned. I recall openly LOLing at a number of points during the evening. For anyone interesting in reading the shenanigans that ensued, you can view it all here.

But in the end, there could be only one...While Ceru's brief visit was full of pwnage, and Zil was *always* in contention, in the end TheDarkMuse's Acronyms reigned supreme! Kongrats TDM! Wear your custom designed Acrony Avvy with pride!

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

The Tale of Woe (AKA, Zil_'s New Name)

A terrible thing happened on Monday, January 19th. While Zil was wondering the wilds of Kong, simply trying to do her modly duty and protect the innocent chatters of the world, Zil was ambushed. A conglomerate of evildoers from other jealous rooms snuck up behind our beloved heroine and attacked. Zil fought valiantly, slinging her goo as fast as she could. One by one, the trolls were consumed, the list of bans grew, but Zil was slowly being overwhelmed. After many hours of battle, Zil was finally overcome by the impossible odds, and fell to the blade of one of the trolls. Zil was wounded! She banned the offender, and tried to limp away, seeking the cover of the Van. She new that there would be other mods there, reinforcements to aid her in this impossible struggle. The trolls new this too, however, and stepped up their efforts to bring down the mighty Sloth. Agonizingly slow, Zil grew closer and closer to her target, banning as she went. But her limp was slowing her down too much, she feared she would not make it in time, that the wave of trolls would crush her. In a last ditch effort for survival, Zil dredged up every last bit of strength she could muster, and dashed for the door. She leaped through the door to safety, but at the last second, a troll reached her, and hacked off her tail.

Now Zil_ is left scarred, and in need of our support. Her name has been changed, but she is still the same person. Our friend, our owner, our Zil_. So be not saddened by her makeover, but instead rejoice that she survived this ordeal, and managed to ban so many of the enemy as went.

The Three Line ..er.. Thang

I have been asked about, and am told other Sloth mods and regs have had to defend in their modcalls or wanderings.. the Three Line Thang. So let me explain here the philosophy behind it so that all may know, and hopefully fewer people will freak out about it.
--
The Three Line Thang: Sloths are anti-energetic. If there are more than three consecutive chat entries from a single user before another user speaks the offending user may be beaten with a wet noodle and teased mercilessly depending on Mod discretion. Three is fine. Four crosses the line.
--
The Three Line Thang was created when I was newly modded and we had a few clueless spazzes in the room who needed clearer guidance. (And I needed some way to draw a line.) I never imagined it would live on so long. The regulars adore it. They share it with everyone who comes in. It keeps chat at a readable pace, and encourages folks to be a bit more thoughtful about what they say and how they say it. It also allows the room some control on who gets to ramble - if what you are saying is something they like - they will respond. If it isn't - they will all be quiet - leaving you stranded on the third line. That said - the only time I have ever silenced someone is when they were spamming up a storm or are pushing the line intentionally to antagonize the room. Mod discretion is a key part. :) So while there are those who hear it and freak out - it really isnt as bad as it sounds. Has become a rather useful tool really. The room polices it far more than the mods do. And it has become a key part of what makes Sloth Sloth!

Saturday, January 17, 2009

And so it begins.....

Let the 1st Sloth Kongai tournament begin!!! We start with our 3-round Round Robin portion of our tournament, before moving to the single elimination playoffs. This begins Round 1 of the Round-Robin.

First, let us cover the rules that shall govern the round robin portion of the tournament(the phase we are in now) :

  1. All games will be 3-card matches. You can choose from a random selection of cards or use your own pre-made decks. Your choice. Your opponent may also choose to use a random deck, or one of their own pre-made decks.
  2. To play a match, check the chart (below) to see who your opponent is. Then simply greet them in chat and decide when you want to play out your match.
  3. During the match, record how many of your opponents cards you kill.
  4. When the match is over, one of you will make a comment here with the basic match details. These will include who won, who lost, and how many cards each of you killed. If you choose to include more detail of what went on in your match, please feel free to include the blow-by-blow details!!
  5. Limited trash-talking is permitted, but if the other person says stop you stop immediately. Harassing your opponent beyond that point will result in immediate disqualification from the tournament. If you plan to trash-talk, keep it clean and respectful.
  6. Anyone caught H4xx0rz1ng a game will be immediately disqualified from the tournament, and reported to the admins.
  7. MAKE SURE YOU HAVE A GOOD CONNECTION BEFORE STARTING A MATCH. A match lost to a timeout or disconnect will still count as a loss to you. There will be no do-overs.
  8. Any discrepancies or disagreement should be brought before me (Tarlanon) for arbitration. Whisper my Kong profile or catch me in chat if you need to discuss something.
After everyone has played their matches, I will re-match you against a different opponent and round 2 will begin. If you have any questions regarding the tournament, it's rules or your matches, please either track me down in chat or shout/whisper my profile. And now, your 1st round match ups :


Good luck everyone!!!

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Better Know a Sloth! (Part 2)

Well, in my complete and utter lack of any ideas for this blog, I decided that I'll try to get myself off my butt and make some more questionnaires in order to help us all better to get to know each other as fellow sloths. In case you didn't read and/or respond the the original one, please do so here.

1)If you could use the force, what kind of things would you use it for? (Lets keep this creative and non-violent)
2)If you had the ability, means, and motivation to make an epic flash game, what would it be about?
3)If forced to choose between the two, would you sell your body, or your soul? (The belief that souls don't exist limits you to the former, so tough luck all you non-spiritualists!)
4)Taco bell, KFC, or Panda Express? (Sorry to anyone who doesn't have any or all of these..just pick as best you can :P)
5)If you could only choose three types of instruments to create a band, orchestra, etc. What would they be? (Choose between stringed, brass, woodwinds, percussion, and voices.)
6)What is you least favorite kind of "game" on Kongregate?
7)If you could have any color of non-fading, non-greying hair (unless you wanted it to of course) what would that color be?
8)Are there any music albums you are anticipating this year? If so, which one(s)?
9)If Sloth made a shirt, would you buy it? Tell the truth now! >.>
10)Tell us something random about yourself!

Kongai Tournament Entry Deadline + Acrony night!!

Hey all! Just a few friendly updates regarding the upcoming epic Sloth Kongai tournament and our promised Acrony night!!

First off, Thanks to everyone for the great response to 1st Annual Sloth Kongai tournament! But it is time to set and entry deadline and get this sucker underway! The deadline for other entrants into the tournament will be this Friday, January 16th, at 9pm CST (Central Standard Time). If you are a sloth regular and want to participate in this tournament, you MUST register before this time.

To register simply whisper my Kongregate profile (Don't whisper me in chat) with your Interest in entering the tournament along with your current Kongai Skill Rank. The link to my profile can be found here :

http://www.kongregate.com/accounts/Tarlanon

And just because you've never played before is no reason not to enter the tournament! It's a chance to battle your favourite Sloth buddies for title of Supreme Kongai Overloard Dominator! And there is even a great 5 point badge associated with Kongai that can help you get started and learn the ropes of the game before crushing the hopes and dreams of your favourite Slothite on the Kongai field of battle! Link to the game is here :

http://www.kongregate.com/cards

Again, the deadline for entries is Friday, January 16th, at 9pm CST (Central Standard Time) Don't forget!

Acrony night!

Now on to the good stuff, Acrony night!! Let's try for Acrony night on Friday, January 23rd, at 8pm CST. That sounds like the time that might work best for everyone who has replied so far. This won't be our only Acrony night, so don't worry if you can't make this one! We'll have others. Unlike most Kong games, you will need Adobe's shockwave player in order to play this game. Get it here : http://get.adobe.com/shockwave/

See you all then!

Oh, and if anyone has any questions about any of these, either leave a comment here or track me down in chat and I'll be happy to help you!

~Mr. T

Monday, January 5, 2009

Thine Muse has spoken!!!

Whatchoo talking about fool? What I am talking about is our very own LazyMuse, talented artiste and Sloth Hall of Famer, is looking to put together some ideas for our very own, custom made, Sloth T-Shirts!

Yeah, you heard me. T-Shirts!!!! =D

But, our lovely Miss Muse requires your help! She needs ideas as to what the design should be. Text, pictures, whatever you think would look great on our own custom Tees. Please comment this entry with whatever your ideas are. This is your chance to be a part of creating Sloth history! Get to it peoples!

(and while you are at it, sign up for Acrony night and the Kongai Tourney! -- details below in the omfgitsanewblogentry post)

~Mr. T

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Flapping in the breeze...

What better way to ring in the new year, but with a new blog post! =D

A while ago (as Zil often enjoys reminding me), I had the distinct honour of sitting down with the current owner of our beloved room on Kongregate, Sloth. That's right, I got to sit down and ask a few questions of the legendary and talented ZilFlap herself! With the room aglow with her subtle radiance, I set about my task of learning as much about this wonderful person as I could, and now I have the distinct pleasure of being able to share some of that experience with all of you. So without further adieu, I give you Zil :

1. When/How did you discover Kongregate? What kept you coming back for more?

Feb. '08. I was game hunting, and I found Desktop Tower Defense. The next time I searched it - it sent me to Kongregate. Became obsessed with the game, and then discovered I could win achievements! Had to sign up. Although, I couldn't actually GET the badges for DTD! So my first badges are the easy on Fancy Pants and then the Pillage the Village set. (I still can't get the stinky medium and hard badges on DTD.)

2. When did you/How did you come to find Sloth, and make it your home?

Sloth was the room I was put in, and I thought the name fit. It was a sad, dead place back then. Slowly conversations started with "Does anyone know how to .." and then blossomed into a deadly combination of competition and encouragement between me, Visitant, SgtDroopy, and Galexan. (and a few others who sadly have since pretty much faded from Kong.) I was totally hooked! No way was I going to fall behind the guys. :)

We worked on badges and leveling up together - sharing tips and hints. They almost always got them before me, but every now and then I could scoop them. We were on the most at the same time, (and were the chattiest) but looking back through my fans list there are a lot of other people who more quietly or intermittently have hung around since those days!

That is how Sloth became my online home. Sloth had a few other steps on the way to me become its owner. Back those days we were a Jim Greer room. Not owned by anyone, and for about 5 months we didn't even know moderators existed! The room moderated itself through the power of the mass mute and sarcastic wit. Then one day our resident troll (who has since reformed and become part of our community - yay!) inspired a non-regular who had been stuck in Sloth to call a mod. It was a revelation! The Kong world beyond Sloth and ability to do something more than just mute the foul mouthed ones! The mod was KnightofRa and he was a regular visitor for awhile there, but he already had his own room. The Sloths were determined to get one of these magical moderators for themselves. So when the oh-so-nice Lazymuse dropped by and liked us we were very happy. :) When she adopted us we were thrilled to become owned. Sloth had graduated out of the wilds of the Greer rooms!

Thanks to KnightofRa and Lazymuse I become a mod - I was honored and pleased to be able to help out our community. And when the dreaded Real Life intruded on Lazymuse's Kong time, I was very, very happy to take on ownership and watch over our friendly online place. :)

3. Who was the first person who friended you on Kong (or who did you first friend)?

My first friend and fan was my son - Gunman123. And even that was weeks after we started playing. :) It usually takes awhile for me to friend people.

4. What are your top 3 favorite games on Kong?

Tri-achnid - because it is just so different! Pillage the Village - because who doesn't love throwing villagers into the air? And then, hmm... all the good puzzle games lumped together.

5. We all know being a mod is tough work. What is your best memory as a mod? Your worst?

My best is every time someone says, "Wow, Sloth is great!" Because, since I have been around helping to set the tone from chat room with no chat to what we have today, I am just really proud of our community. My worst goes hand in hand with that - any time one of our regulars disrupts chat I am very, very disappointed. I am very possessive of Sloth - even when I am not there I often leave myself logged on a guest and read back through the chat. I want to know everything that happens there! (lol - as I saw on someone's profile the other day.. "Big moderator is watching you!")

6. If you could change just ONE thing about Kongregate, what would it be?

I wish there was a better way to get people to the room that matches them. Like when you looked at the room list it would tell you more about the room's personality - there are rooms that love to debate, or who are looser on the language, or with role playing, rooms that are mostly younger or mostly older players, etc etc. Sloth is very ... uptight really in a lot of ways - and it's not the ideal room for everyone. People should explore more!

7. When you are not on Kong (Which is when??), what are some of your favorite hobbies?

I am always on Kong! (but when I am there and not paying attention I can be found with my family, or reading (usually fantasy or theology,) or watching science fiction TV.

8. What is an interesting thing about you not many people know?

Well, a lot of people don't seem to know that I am female. ;) But aside from that...while it's not what I do now, my degree and supposed profession is Theater Direction and Design. Especially lighting design.

9. If you could have 1 super power (any super power), what would it be, and why?

My daughter is very into Pokemon - there are some that have the attack power of "charm" Wish I had that... to, you know, balance out the snark. ;)

10. If you could change any ONE thing about this world, what would it be?

I would make everyone understand "Show up, and be nice." i.e Take your responsibilities seriously, and be there for other people.

And there you have it! Stay tuned for more exciting interviews with some of the legendary characters who make up Sloth!

~Mr. T